Cool, that reminds me of Lily. Gadgets I'd like to play with, but have no real use for (yet)!
Please, if you haven't, do read www.cregox.com/your-home (there's also a link for a few codes on the botton, including background videos).
Adding an auto play to the video could be something as simple as adding this code:
But, with this, I would remove the video sound, at least by default. It's just about setting it in wistia. Makes for better UX.
All the rest is quite more complicated and I would have to dig deeper. Looks like you want many customizations and so it might worth considering going with the developer platform.
In any case, I can work on all of it starting with U$321.